“Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God” – A course in miracles
The Ego is our limited perception of ourselves comprised of all roles, identities, labels, comparisons and judgments we create around our persona and with which later on we identify as being who we are. It sees itself always as separate from everything else and constantly filters everything through a polarity mind-set of either/or, judging, labeling, analyzing and comparing in its desire to separate everything in groups of good or bad, right or wrong, white or black, happy or unhappy. It is very clever and hard to identify because it is embedded in our personality and life experience, it contains our fearful and separated thoughts, feelings, words or behaviors. We cannot get rid of our ego by repressing it or by fighting it because it will just become stronger and lash out when we least expect it. Have you ever had one of those moments where you couldn’t believe that you said or did what you did when you knew better but for whatever reason could not help yourself? That is ego and only by being self aware and guiding your every thought, feeling and action from a place of love for yourself and others you will unmask all those false beliefs and come to hear the voice of your true self at all times. Everything else coming from lower emotions of unworthiness, blame, shame, guilt, revenge, depression etc are all creations and projections of the ego and they create fears and unpleasant events, people and circumstances that will present themselves into your life to prove and reinforce your Ego’s need to be right.
Self awareness is all about changing our perceptions and dissolving the illusions that our Ego created to keep us “safe”, the biggest one being that we are separate from everything else and we are in danger. Your Loving Self feels love at all times and sees everything as being one and connected with everything else, and you are in connection with your true self at all times. But you cannot hear that voice until you learn to quiet down your loud and chattery Ego mind that is always trying to get your attention with all sorts of scary stories or perceived pains. That is why it is so important to listen to your positive feelings, because they come from your true self and that voice will always bring you peace, happy news or guide you to take action that feels good to you. Your positive emotions are the only true instrument that connect you with that higher part of you, and let you know what is real in the moment. Negative emotions are valuable only because they show you that the Source which you are part of does not have the skewed perception you are having and so give you feedback about your alignment with your higher self so you can realize the illusion and decide to create something better, something that you want.
From the moment you are born you start losing contact with your true self because you come into this plane and everything around you seems to be separate from everything else, you are in a body and have a mind and rely on your five senses and your mind to interpret and perceive a fixed reality. Then well meaning people in your life start teaching you about all the dangers that are present all around you and what is the right way to BE. Slowly you stop listening to your intuition, to who you truly are and what feels right to you and instead try to fit in and please others because you want their love and validation. There is no wonder that your Ego becomes stronger and stronger since you are taught to disregard your inner guidance and instead listen to everyone and everything that is outside of you, you get to the point where you’re so confused and angry because you don’t know what is true anymore and how come you’re doing the “right” things but somehow you don’t seem to be happy. You want all sorts of things and experiences but you seem to be living the opposite of that and you just don’t understand what is the meaning of all this, why so much struggle and suffering? The suffering is happening because you keep disregarding your intuition and emotions and stay stuck in fear listening to the scary stories that your Ego mind keeps creating.
Every false perception, every pain you feel gives you the opportunity to see that you have a false belief regarding that subject and that you can choose to experience whatever you would like to experience from that moment on..By changing your perceptions, your beliefs about your life, you are changing the experience of your life and everything will be projected from inside out..Every external experience mirrors our belief about ourselves,if we experience the world as being hostile that is because we don’t love yourselves, if we experience the world as scarce that is because we think we are unworthy etc..every pain is a projection that our mind creates in the outer so we can blame, not take responsibility and not search inside for truth. All pain is an illusion of the ego mind, an illusion created and perpetuated so that we will continue to blame and feel victims of outside circumstances instead of looking inside and discovering that there is a greater field of love and peace that we are part of and that supports us unconditionally and life can be easy and joyful..It all comes from judgments and guilt we have against ourselves and our Ego attracts these situations so that we can perpetuate the belief that we are powerless.That is why it is so important to keep forgiving yourself for all the pain you created or create for yourself, get your power back and get to create something else. Slowly you will uncover all the false perceptions you have that are produced by guilt, shame and unworthiness which are the emotions with the lowest frequency and the most predominant Ego constructs, and life will change. All of our problems come from not loving ourselves and believing that we are powerless and separate from others. Because of that we are projecting our suffering out there so we can have a justification and not love others either and get to feel right about our pain, but that just brings more suffering because the Ego will never stop looking for things that are going wrong or for identifying pain and disappointment.
All we are really seeking is unconditional love for ourselves and the world, because the source that we come from feels that at all times and deep down inside we want to be aligned with that, we know it is the truth but we get derailed by all the Ego constructs and stories. Healing our Ego minds can happen if we surrender and extend love to ourselves, feel compassion for that part of us that lives in illusion, that created all of our fears and insecurities, and in that moment authentically come back to who we truly are-to playfulness, joy and perfect love knowing that all is all right and that it is safe to live in the unknown. You came here in order to enjoy life so stop asking why and just go for the ride of happiness you so want, feel those feelings in your heart first and then everything in your outside reality will re-arrange itself to support your inner life.
When you begin this process of self discovery and dissolving all conscious and unconscious limiting beliefs, depending on how resistant your Ego is, it will act out more or less because it does not want things to change and lose control and it will have temper tantrums and create unwanted situations to discourage you in your journey towards truth and freedom. Some of the manifestations can take the form of unwanted events in your outer reality that want to keep you paralyzed in the same conditions. That is because when you set a new intention whatever doesn’t serve you anymore, whatever lower feeling you have repressed up to now, needs to be acknowledged and the belief associated with it changed into a helpful and healthy one. Also you might observe that you are overwhelmed with “negative” feelings, sometime caused by outside circumstances other times for no reason whatsoever: blame, guilt, despair, hatred etc. Again be gentle with yourself, become aware of them and the illusion that they are trying to uncover and they will rise in vibrational frequency. Periods of temporary apathy, depression, anxiety, or confusion might overwhelm you at times. The more compassion you have for yourself the faster they will go away, seek help and talk to somebody if you feel like you cannot handle it, a coach can help you understand your repressed emotions and thoughts and help you reach the next level of awareness and empowerment. A lot of times you will feel like this is all too hard and will start making excuses for stopping the process of becoming responsible for your life and emptying yourself of garbage. This is an attempt of the Ego to have you stop facing your feelings and beliefs and listen instead to your mind’s stories about the ineffectiveness of the process. The story might have variations of: “Look what is happening to you, why are you doing this to yourself, you were better off before you started this enlightenment process, look how bad this feels, it is all a lie”, or “People will think you’re crazy” or “ You’re irresponsible, instead of working hard you’re wasting time on energy alignment, yeah right like that is going to help you??”
Isolation from other people or over-socializing at certain points in the process might also occur or a back and forth between feelings of empowerment, knowing that everything will be alright and totally trusting the process followed by powerlessness and despair. In order to move from guilt, it is good to get angry at God in these moments and speak all your frustrations, doubts and pains, tell the consciousness you are fed up with so much struggle and ask for help in removing whatever Ego constructs you don’t seem to be able to remove. We are always helped and supported in our journey, but because our minds want to know what is going to happen and control everything, we cannot relax and let the higher part of us bring all the joy we want because we focus on what is going wrong, so it is good to ask for help. I will talk more about ways of creating a connection with your True Self through simple practices so that you can start involving your conscious mind in the process and learn to let go of struggle and instead trust more in the Divine.
To make an analogy this process is like trying to deal with an angry child, your Ego is like a child that will kick and scream strongly in the beginning and the more you sooth it and get it to let go of the need to control everything the more it will relax and quiet down and you will be able to live more as your Authentic Self. If you resist feeling the fear and low emotions it will just get more and more frustrated and gain momentum onto creating even more unpleasant feelings which will create unpleasant external circumstances.
Your Egoic mind is fearful and it is a tool that has been designed for survival and hasn’t really been evolving through time, therefore your only way to calm it down is by cherishing the messages of misalignment that it brings and soothing it with love. Make friends with your dark self and you might find some amazing gifts in that darkness.Usually our greatest weaknesses after enlightenment become our greatest strengths, they are valuable teachers.
Hicks, Esther, Hicks, Jerry, The Astonishing Power of Emotions: Let Your Feelings Be Your Guide, Hay House,2008.Paperback
Hicks, Esther, Hicks, Jerry,The Vortex: Where the Law of Attraction Assembles All Cooperative Relationships, Hay House, 2009.Paperback